A new toy

    So today I am sitting outside, smoking a cigarette and enjoying the rare warmth in this region this late in fall. Spent most of the morning tinkering away on my new little tablet and figuring out all the bells and whistles, and now I'm sitting down using it to type this blog. It is going to take a while to get used to not having a physical keyboard but its not that bad, the tablet is large enough for two hand typing so that allows for less errors in my strokes. I am finding my free time more and more devoured by my work schedule, working seven days a week in excess of sixty hours or so. The money is good but it is exceptionally taxing on my mind, oh well that just just gives me more fuel for this blog.

    My thoughts recently have been filled with the general disdain for humanity, typical fair, and the desire to understand how people can be so stupid. My line of work affords me the opportunity to see people at crucial points in their life that require heavy decision making and I see them more often than not making the poorest decisions. It's frustrating when you come to the realization that if these people would take two seconds to look at the long term they would see how disastrous the outcome they are heading towards. I just want to reach over and start shaking them by the neck yelling ''Wake up you stupid fucks and get you heads out of your asses''.

    On a less headache inducing note I have decided to go full on with this blog: making a twitter, Google, and in the process of working up a website for all of this. While blogging is not my long term career goal, its a step in a journalism career and putting myself out there as much as I possibly can. I also want to get a good professional quality camera for good measure, a costly endeavor but worth it I think in the long run. I have one interview under my belt and I need more, and the only way people will take me seriously for an interview is if I look professional. I have a convention coming up in march and I will see what I can pull out of my ass.

I think that is all for today, I have to get ready for work and slave away my brain cells. Strangely enough I like this job, let's me harness my inner cynic.

Staring at the walls

   I just got back from voting and I have been sitting around in my room listening to random people talking about their issues and opinions in the form of podcasts all while staring at the wall and pondering my day. Thinking about all my days for that matter. I have gotten into a new routine with my new job and it's already wearing a little thin, but I am finally accepting that as a part of life. I am slaving away 50 to 60 of my hours a week for some spare change so I can try and twist my life around and make something of it. So in the midst of my daydreaming and vegetating in my bedroom I decided to make this blogspot for multiple reasons. First off I need a place to vent, I need to just get all this shit off my mind and spit all the venom and vitriol out. Second I need a way to not be so goddamn angry all the time, so by using reason number 1 I can achieve reason number 2. Finally the third reason I wanted to make this is to try and reach out to people, find a common denominator, find a way to connect with people that are just as unhinged and cynical as I am and put meaning to all of this.

    So I sit here in this dimly lit room, staring at my dingy yellowed walls and think to myself how I want to go about this; what do I write? Do I write about how my life is going, sort of like a public journal for people to read and learn more about me? Do I whine out all the piss and vinegar inside of me to the world and just use this as a ranting post to throw my shit at so it doesn't land on all those I do care about? Or do I just try to mix up A and B and turn it into C where I can use it all to try and entertain people. I have always enjoyed making people laugh and making peoples day a bit better, despite my general cynical outlook I do enjoy some people and enjoy lifting their spirits from time to time. I guess as time progresses and I write more here I will find the answer to those questions.

     And that's about it, that's whats on my mind right now. I type a bit then look back at my little walls and think some more, then go back to moving my little fingers on this keyboard in hopes something halfway intelligible shows up. If I gain nothing else out of this at least it will prove to be therapeutic.


James A. Wolfe